Welcome to this relatively tough topic but hugely progressive if approached with care and consideration.
It requires an open and honest conversation about who you are and how you share your own energy or to recognise that this negative energy sits with someone close to you and you need to somehow address/deal with it.
Let’s face it, you have all had those days where something bad or annoying happens, you bump into someone or wait to speak to a friend/loved one and you let it ALL out.
Sharing your thoughts is beneficial, it allows you to communicate your frustrations, and, in most cases, you feel better about the situation and yourself. Ideally, once shared, you move FORWARD.
HOWEVER if this becomes a pattern where you find yourself sharing these frustrations or someone sharing theirs with you leaving you feeling DRAINED, LOW and even ANGRY at the time wasted in listening to the same conversation AGAIN…you have an ENERGY VAMPIRE lurking in your circle.
For the sake of this blog I am going to set the scene as though YOU (the reader) have an Energy Vampire in your life. It could be that you are in fact the Energy Vampire, so simply think about how you behave in these situations and whether you are self-aware, in denial and if you do want to be less of a vampire!
First off, not all vampires have NEGATIVE energy, if you have seen Twilight, you may in fact like the idea of being a vampire. The problem arises is when something is taken from you (your energy) and the vampire shows no consideration towards you and your feelings – it’s all about them getting their fix.
WHAT IS AN ENERGY VAMPIRE?
When someone feels low or is in a difficult situation, they are going through an energy shift or transformation. If they are not SELF-AWARE they may fall into a vicious cycle of feeling like the whole world is against them, bad things happen to them and they can’t change their circumstance. This is a part of life, you are all here to learn lessons, to work through them and move forward. The moment you refuse to learn the lesson or work on yourself and place the onerous task on someone else or a situation you are in fact denying yourself the chance to change and learn.
An energy vampire is a person in denial or subconsciously wants others to drop to their level of low dense energy so they can feel better about themselves.
This image shows how someone who has dense energy (in red) transfers this to the person they are sharing their thoughts and words with.
HOW DOES IT IMPACT YOU?
If you are someone who seems to attract the same Energy Vampire, or a flock of Energy Vampires, you could be mirroring your own feelings and need to do some of your own energy work.
In most cases, you could be a victim of your own success – if you are perceived as someone who has it all together, are strong energetically the Energy Vampire might find you attractive and therefore gravitate towards you. You could in fact be someone who swoons in and always tries to listen and help that person – therefore making their offloading acceptable.
It may seem flattering at first, oh this person feels safe around me and trusts me enough to share their deep thoughts or worries and I feel good (ego loves this) about myself as I am helping them. It can be rewarding at times to be that savior, the person that makes someone else feel better.
The problem arises when these GOOD feelings cease and your own energy is impacted (as demonstrated in the image above), those feel-good feelings turn to dread, anxiousness and even sadness. Not all interactions need to be POSITIVE, but if the majority of interactions leave YOU feeling down and depleted, the ENERGY VAMPIRE has done their bit and will walk away feeling better (usually in the short term).
HOW TO TAKE ACTION?
BOUNDARIES
Yup that easy to say concept but tough to implement one you may have heard about. You may find it hard to set and stick with them or worry you will come across as unkind or make the Energy Vampire feel worse as you become yet another person saying no to them. In the long run, you are doing both yourself and the Energy Vampire good. If your energy is depleted, you cannot be there for others if you become sick from all the dense energy you will not be able to be there for that person.
Depression, physical illness all comes from continuous dense energy stuck to your aura. You are not responsible for other people’s happiness or to always be available if they aren’t ready to take charge of their own lives.
Take a moment to think about how YOU feel after your interactions with this person.
Do you feel drained, unable to continue with your day, sad, irritable etc?
Do you find yourself obliged to respond to their messages instantly or pick up the phone to them?
Do you find yourself saying yes to meet ups but always dread having said yes and start thinking of how to get out of meeting up?
If you have answered YES to any of the above, then the first thing you can do is:
CREATE SPACE
It may not always be physically possible if you live with them or see them at work each day but mentally doing this and allowing yourself to consciously try and create space is a good first step.
Perhaps think about not responding immediately to that person. You do not have to be BUSY to not reply. Saying no or giving yourself time away from them can create a healthy boundary and let them know that you are not always going to be available and that is OK.
BE HONEST
Let them know that you DO NOT have the capacity to listen/help them at this point in time. Suggest that they seek professional help (Therapist/Healing Facilitator) to help them work through their issues as you no longer feel you can provide them with what they need and need to focus on yourself.
STEP BACK
Say what you need to say then try not to engage in the conversation as you may find yourself falling victim to being sucked back into their negative energy.
How to use CRYSTALS to help you deal with ENERGY VAMPIRES?
Crystals have the wonderful ability to offer a circle of protection around you. Either through expanding their own energy around you or encouraging you to tap into your own. Below are a list of crystals that can help with consciously bringing awareness to your aura. Making it impenetrable, and more importantly help you to deflect negative energy.
AMETHYST
This is a highly protective crystal. It works at your mental and spiritual level which creates a much larger circle of protection around you. By wearing Amethyst AND visualising a circle of protection around you helps you create a barrier to other people's NEGATIVE energy.
CARNELIAN
A highly intuitive crystal, it connects you to YOUR inner-SELF. It also helps to ground your energy. By focusing inward, & playing to your strengths, you are creating a stronger energy field around you. This will give you the strength to ward off negative energy.
If you are an empath, your energy is sensitive and attract energies that require help. If you are working on yourself, protecting, and strengthening your energy then your work as an empath will be sustainable.
If this isn’t the case, you will find yourself, drained and unable to move forward.
ROSE QUARTZ
This crystals is usually advertised as the crystal of LOVE, but loving others or attracting your soul mate which I believe is misleading. I see it as one for teaching how to LOVE yourself FIRST. When you show yourself the LOVE and attention the ENERGY VAMPIRE is sucking from you, you are telling yourself, them and the universe that you MATTER. This creates a powerful circle of energy around you and helps you to stand up for yourself and not let others take advantage of you.
MOONSTONE
Although this wouldn’t be one I would think of immediately as having protective and strengthening properties, it does have the ability to help clear your energy and place you in a state of flowing energy. If you are unable to physically distance yourself from an Energy Vampire, wearing Moonstone can help you clear their negative energy regularly, so it doesn’t build up in your own aura and leave you feeling dense and depleted.
Ultimately, you are ALL responsible for your OWN energy. Taking time to assess how you are feeling, where you need to make changes or seek help results in an environment conducive to healing.
Please note, I speak from my own experience and as a qualified Crystal and Spiritual Healer. I am not a trained therapist, my views and opinions are my own and I too seek help from professionals such as GP’s, specialists, and Therapists to help me either deal with people that I recognise as depleting my energy of I am stuck in a pattern and am an Energy Vampire myself.
How to use crystals to help you connect to the state you feel needs the most attention? Explore the website or book a healing with me, we can discuss your current energetic state, your goals for your mental well-being and how we can get you there in a supported and guided way.
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